Who works because they have to in order to pay the bills? Well... almost everyone! Of course we work for money. Why else would we work?
Here's the thing, though. Wanting to make money, more money, lots of money.... is not right or wrong. It is simply a desire or goal you have. Being mindful about that means not attaching to it as being something that is necessary to make you feel happy or successful or complete.
What if we took money out of the equation when we decide where to work or what job to take or what business to start or why we stay in a job? It's a no-brainer that money is necessary to live and MORE money is a nice thing to have. Some people place a higher importance on it than others - and that's completely cool. But are you happy? Are you fulfilled? Do you use money as your indicator for how successful you are? After the excitement of the money wears off (because it always does), are you working at something you feel passionate about? Do you feel like you are contributing to something? Are you healthy and well? Do you spend time doing things and being with the people you love?
You don't have to cure a terminal illness or create the solution to poverty to feel you are contributing. One of our basic human needs is to feel we are contributing to something. You can serve an ice cream cone on a boardwalk and smile to the customers, and you could be contributing to someone's well-being.
Being mindful doesn't mean living on the streets. A mindful leader also has to work to pay the bills. Being mindful means being aware, being in the moment, making conscious choices, and not attaching to the outcomes. So a mindful leader may want to make money, and may even place it high on his or her list of goals - or not... but it's not what makes them happy or unhappy. A mindful leader does not stress less just because they make more money. Stresses are always there whether a collector is calling your house or your yacht just sunk.
What does your dream workplace/job/business look like? Almost everyone will have 'make enough money to live the life I want' in the description. But what else? How are you contributing in your job or business? What is REALLY important to you and how can that be incorporated into your workday and/or business?
So go ahead and work for money! AND create meaning in your work. If there's no meaning and you feel stressed or unwell a lot of the time, what is your money really worth?
Friday, June 13, 2014
Thursday, May 22, 2014
Are you Disciplined Enough for a Meditation Practice?
I have been having a rough few months with my eating habits. Funnily, I just developed and tested a Mind Fitness Program that helps groups make more mindful choices in their wellness! And although I have believed in choice for many years, I realized I had turned to trying to be disciplined over the last few months... and kept making unhealthy choices.
Many people that are trying to eat healthier or lose weight often use the phrase, "I should be more disciplined." Well, I disagree. Your discipline muscle will get tired after a while and you will give in to your cravings and old habits... UNLESS you create new habits that are meaningful for you.
You make choices in life. You choose how to behave. You choose what to think. You choose to eat that chocolate bar... or not. Being mindful means being aware of your choices... being aware of the impact they have... and not judging... yourself or others.
Practicing mindfulness is no different from eating healthy. Your formal practice is very important for growing your mindfulness muscle, yet every single client I have had finds it difficult to meditate daily. So do I some days! So what is the problem? And what is the solution?
Part of the problem is that you haven't found the reason that is meaningful for you to take on a mindfulness and meditation practice. Is it to be healthier? Is it so you can stop missing out on the moments in your life? Is it so you can share it with others? Is it so you can reduce stress? Is it so you can be a better leader? A calmer parent? It doesn't matter what the reason is, you just have to have one.
Part of the problem is also that you may not truly see yourself as that kind of person. So you try to change yourself by being disciplined. But your discipline muscle depletes its energy and you are back to old habits because you have not truly chosen to be that kind of person.
What can you do? Make a choice. Choose to be a mindful person. Choose to be that person that meditates each day. Choose a lifestyle that works for behaving mindfully. Choose how you design your weekly schedule and incorporate formal practice into it. Choose to build a mindful team at work. Choose to choose meditation. And accept that whatever is... is. Whatever you chose, you chose. You can choose something different now... or tomorrow... or next month. It's your choice! And the outcomes from your choices are yours too.
Indeed, making the choices is not always easy - especially if you are not surrounded by like-minded people. But guess what? Every time you practice making the choice to be mindful, you have improved your mindfulness! That's how it works. Before you know it, you will believe wholeheartedly that you ARE that kind of person... the kind that meditates... or the kind that eats healthy... or the kind that rides a bike to work... or the kind that remains calm in a stressful situation.... or the kind that lives life to the fullest.... You are whatever you choose.
So what's your choice?
Friday, May 2, 2014
Dance Through the Laundry
I work from
home. Sometimes on Fridays I take an
hour or two out of my workday to do house/personal stuff…. Run errands, fix the broken
screen, tidy the toys, clean the dishes… or do laundry.
I don’t
really enjoy laundry. I stick it in the
washer and dryer no problem, but I end up with mounds of clean clothes and
towels at the end of the week, and I’m not too fussy about folding it all. So I blast the music and dance while I
fold. It can be one of the most
enjoyable times in my day, and I’m totally pumped to get more work done afterwards (I just finished folding five loads and am finally getting to the blog!).
I have been
a dancer my entire life, although I haven’t always taken classes. I have been known to incorporate dance into
my workshops and team meetings. Yeah, I’m
one of those people. But, really…
everyone is always more energized afterwards.
So I thought….
Why not incorporate dance breaks into your work day? It really doesn’t matter where you are or
what you do. You just have to get a song
on your phone these days and start moving.
People smile and laugh, release endorphins, get the blood flowing, and
tend to get focused on the moment. Yes…
get focused on the moment…. Get mindful.
I worked
with a client who had laughing breaks in their workplace daily – love that idea
too! Why not dance? Imagine the lady holding the road sign
dancing while you passed? Imagine the
customer service clerk having a little shake while he answered the phone? Imagine getting your team together for a
little boogie mid-day to remember to laugh, dance, and enjoy this moment?
The rewards go beyond having fun, being healthy, or ramping up your energy. Getting back to the moment through movement can also lessen stress and improve creativity. The next time you or your team are stuck on a decision or conflict is rising... dance through the laundry.
Dance on!
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
The Entrepreneur's Response To: 'How's Business?'
I attended a conference last week for The Newfoundland and Labrador Organization for Women Entrepreneurs. It was a wonderful opportunity to network with other business owners and listen to some fabulous speakers share their insights on business topics. And it was an opportunity to practice answering the question, 'How's business?'
Have you ever wondered if your answer to that question was helping or hindering you?
I recently realized I do not like that question and my answer often made me feel icky - so it was hindering me. In my mindfulness practice, I am learning to manage the highs and lows in life and business. One of the mindful leadership traits I practice is poise - and, let's be honest, I'm still practicing! When someone asks the question, 'How's business?' I've struggled with the answer.
At times business is fabulous and I want to scream from the mountaintops that I'm making it! Some big contract just came through... my week is full of clients... I exceeded a goal... etc. And then at times business is slow, I'm marketing and developing and making connections - or sometimes not. Maybe I didn't win a contract or maybe my week has no revenue generating activities. At those times I'd like to tell the person asking me the question how tough everything is.
But I don't do that either. Anymore.
Entrepreneurs, especially those in their first few years of business, often have extreme highs and lows. The excitement of securing a large contract in an industry you've been targeting for a year is as thrilling as not having any revenue generating activity on the books for a week (or two or three) is devastating. To be able to go home at night and live happily means being able to manage the extremes.
Most entrepreneurs consciously choose this path. We enter it knowing the struggles and chaos facing us. We know 80% of businesses fail in the first two years - and many of us have already been one of those statistics. We know we likely won't have a regular salary for a year or two or three. And we know we are passionate and want to lead the way with a concept or service or product and not follow someone else's idea. It's part of who we are. But it doesn't mean we know how to manage it all.
Entrepreneurs often feel alone. They do not want to let others know they are struggling in business in fear of losing potential clients, contracts, or employees. They feel responsible for their employees' lives. They feel responsible for ensuring enough money comes into the family to put food on the table. When something fails in business, they take it on as a personal failure. Entrepreneurs feel the weight of the world on their shoulders.
When an entrepreneur can bring mindful leadership into their business and work, they can alleviate the weight. Of course, meditation as a daily practice will help anyone feel less stressed and more energetic. However, it's the minor adjustments of the mind throughout the day that will make a powerful impact on how an entrepreneur feels about business.
According to Jon Kabat-Zinn, acceptance is one of the attitudinal factors for mindfulness. As an entrepreneur, accepting that a low in business gives you an opportunity to take care of something will allow you to see the low in a different light. For me, I see the slow times in business as an opportunity to tweak, develop, and take care of me on a personal level. It has taken some time to accept these slow times as, not only needed, but enjoyable. For other businesses, the slow times can present an opportunity to implement a new process, evaluate customer service, or build team cohesiveness. Interestingly, when diving into these development activities, sales often rise as a result.
Another attitudinal factor for mindfulness is letting go. Entrepreneurs want to be 'successful'. We want our businesses to thrive. We are either passionate about what we offer or are passionate about business itself - or both. When we are succeeding in business, we want to hold on to it.... we want it to last forever.... we want to continue to grow and thrive and have fabulous work cultures. But it never works that way. Things change. The environment changes. People change. Demands change. And business must go through these changes in order to thrive again. When entrepreneurs can let go of the need to hold onto the pleasure from the high times, it is easier to flow into transition times or low times. And this takes poise. A mindful leader will be able to celebrate successes without needing them for validation for personal success and be mindful that today's success does not guarantee tomorrow's. A mindful leader and entrepreneur will be as happy and content with the success as with the failure because he/she will let go of the pleasant or unpleasant feelings and know that all that really matters is this moment, and this moment is truly beautiful.
All of this takes practice - a lot of practice. It does not mean we don't work hard to succeed or have a thriving business. It means we can accept where we are, take action, and not cling to business success as a factor for happiness. It means entrepreneurs can stop feeling the weight of the world and start loving the moments. It's OK. And it will make business even better.
So when people now ask, "How's business?" I'm practicing the response, "I love it." That is the truth. And I'm just like any entrepreneur who is learning to manage the highs and lows that come with being a passionate entrepreneur.
Namaste
Have you ever wondered if your answer to that question was helping or hindering you?
I recently realized I do not like that question and my answer often made me feel icky - so it was hindering me. In my mindfulness practice, I am learning to manage the highs and lows in life and business. One of the mindful leadership traits I practice is poise - and, let's be honest, I'm still practicing! When someone asks the question, 'How's business?' I've struggled with the answer.
At times business is fabulous and I want to scream from the mountaintops that I'm making it! Some big contract just came through... my week is full of clients... I exceeded a goal... etc. And then at times business is slow, I'm marketing and developing and making connections - or sometimes not. Maybe I didn't win a contract or maybe my week has no revenue generating activities. At those times I'd like to tell the person asking me the question how tough everything is.
But I don't do that either. Anymore.
Entrepreneurs, especially those in their first few years of business, often have extreme highs and lows. The excitement of securing a large contract in an industry you've been targeting for a year is as thrilling as not having any revenue generating activity on the books for a week (or two or three) is devastating. To be able to go home at night and live happily means being able to manage the extremes.
Most entrepreneurs consciously choose this path. We enter it knowing the struggles and chaos facing us. We know 80% of businesses fail in the first two years - and many of us have already been one of those statistics. We know we likely won't have a regular salary for a year or two or three. And we know we are passionate and want to lead the way with a concept or service or product and not follow someone else's idea. It's part of who we are. But it doesn't mean we know how to manage it all.
Entrepreneurs often feel alone. They do not want to let others know they are struggling in business in fear of losing potential clients, contracts, or employees. They feel responsible for their employees' lives. They feel responsible for ensuring enough money comes into the family to put food on the table. When something fails in business, they take it on as a personal failure. Entrepreneurs feel the weight of the world on their shoulders.
When an entrepreneur can bring mindful leadership into their business and work, they can alleviate the weight. Of course, meditation as a daily practice will help anyone feel less stressed and more energetic. However, it's the minor adjustments of the mind throughout the day that will make a powerful impact on how an entrepreneur feels about business.
According to Jon Kabat-Zinn, acceptance is one of the attitudinal factors for mindfulness. As an entrepreneur, accepting that a low in business gives you an opportunity to take care of something will allow you to see the low in a different light. For me, I see the slow times in business as an opportunity to tweak, develop, and take care of me on a personal level. It has taken some time to accept these slow times as, not only needed, but enjoyable. For other businesses, the slow times can present an opportunity to implement a new process, evaluate customer service, or build team cohesiveness. Interestingly, when diving into these development activities, sales often rise as a result.
Another attitudinal factor for mindfulness is letting go. Entrepreneurs want to be 'successful'. We want our businesses to thrive. We are either passionate about what we offer or are passionate about business itself - or both. When we are succeeding in business, we want to hold on to it.... we want it to last forever.... we want to continue to grow and thrive and have fabulous work cultures. But it never works that way. Things change. The environment changes. People change. Demands change. And business must go through these changes in order to thrive again. When entrepreneurs can let go of the need to hold onto the pleasure from the high times, it is easier to flow into transition times or low times. And this takes poise. A mindful leader will be able to celebrate successes without needing them for validation for personal success and be mindful that today's success does not guarantee tomorrow's. A mindful leader and entrepreneur will be as happy and content with the success as with the failure because he/she will let go of the pleasant or unpleasant feelings and know that all that really matters is this moment, and this moment is truly beautiful.
All of this takes practice - a lot of practice. It does not mean we don't work hard to succeed or have a thriving business. It means we can accept where we are, take action, and not cling to business success as a factor for happiness. It means entrepreneurs can stop feeling the weight of the world and start loving the moments. It's OK. And it will make business even better.
So when people now ask, "How's business?" I'm practicing the response, "I love it." That is the truth. And I'm just like any entrepreneur who is learning to manage the highs and lows that come with being a passionate entrepreneur.
Namaste
Monday, November 25, 2013
Using Mindfulness to Get Your Priorities Straight
Ever feel like you are in one place but you really need to be in another? You have that 'to-do' list that as you cross one thing off, two more things are added and it keeps growing? And you can't get it off your mind? You wish you could be in two places at once.
Mindfulness teaches us to be present and to be where we are. It teaches us to leave the past and future thoughts and get the most out of what you are doing at the present moment. And that's one way of dealing with the problem of not being able to focus in the present moment.
However, when you really are not getting your priorities addressed, you are probably in the wrong place. Being mindful will also help you know when you are in the wrong place and get to the right place.
I don't claim to be perfectly mindful. Nor do I claim to be 100% dedicated to my meditation practice. But because of my practice and knowledge, I know when I need to step back and get re-aligned. When I'm not being fully present, I usually realize it pretty quickly and get mindfully present. I highly recommend it for an amazing life and business with amazing results. Lately, though, I've been losing sight of my priorities. And the universe has a funny way of showing us when things are out of whack!
A lot of external demands are getting my attention lately. One of those is my 2 1/2 year old waking almost every night again for about a month, hence, I'm working on less sleep and much less deep sleep - which is what we require for our cognitive function to be at its best. That one can't really be controlled - except that I need to get to bed earlier (which is a blog in itself!).
However, I also have had other demands that I've been giving my attention to - others wanting to meet, the feeling that I must be networking all the time, responding to emails as soon as possible, the ever lengthening list of newsletters I must read, taking care of my family, being there for my friends in need - you know that list. Well, yeah, my list is looking like this lately. And if I wasn't going to do something about it, the universe was.
Last night, I had an awful dream and woke with a feeling that I couldn't shake. I had a 9:00 full-day networking event scheduled, I had to pack for a trip I'm leaving for tomorrow, and I have at least four items on my list that I must get done before I leave. I managed to get my daughter to daycare (my hubby is traveling for work) and arrive just a few minutes into the 9:00 session. I sat through the first session trying desperately to pay attention but my mind wandered to my 'to-do' list. Knowing I have full control of my thoughts, I began to practice accepting that I have a lot to do and I'm here now so be here.
I managed to get through the morning, but I was almost forcing my pitch to potential clients. I certainly was not in the right head space. Then, I found out that I was on the list for pitching my business one on one to potential clients for the afternoon. Last week, my printer broke, and I did not get my brochures printed for this event - however, I was OK with that because I didn't think I was on that list! I took a moment to think about what would happen if I pitched my business without feeling prepared. And I decided to give up my coveted seat for the afternoon session to someone on the wait-list. I was feeling guilty while driving home, my mind was in the clouds, and I was stopped by a police officer for speeding! Yes! I got a ticket!
I really need to be in the office right now. I need to take care of business. I need to focus. I need to clear off my desk. Although all of the things demanding my attention are important, my priorities lie at taking care of other things, including taking care of my sleep!
Being mindful is not woo-woo and fluff. In fact, it's as practical as it gets. When you are mindful, you inquire about your feelings and thoughts. When mind wandering started for me this morning (and recent weeks), I questioned what was going on for me to be unable to focus. Lack of sleep was the first answer, of course. But I continued to dig and got to the real answers - for me it is literally to spend time in the office getting things done and stop feeling guilty about not networking enough.. When you have the real answers, you can find the solutions that really work, rather than the band-aid ones.
If your list is growing and you really feel you are in the wrong place, try closing your eyes, pay attention to the feeling and sound of your breath, and question - what do you really need to be doing in order to enable yourself to feel present in your life? What is the ONE thing you can do that will make a big difference to your focus and productivity? Then do that. Scratch off all the things that aren't real priorities and get your priorities straight. And while you're at it, spend a little time meditating - because that will help you feel better in all ways.
Mindfulness teaches us to be present and to be where we are. It teaches us to leave the past and future thoughts and get the most out of what you are doing at the present moment. And that's one way of dealing with the problem of not being able to focus in the present moment.
However, when you really are not getting your priorities addressed, you are probably in the wrong place. Being mindful will also help you know when you are in the wrong place and get to the right place.
I don't claim to be perfectly mindful. Nor do I claim to be 100% dedicated to my meditation practice. But because of my practice and knowledge, I know when I need to step back and get re-aligned. When I'm not being fully present, I usually realize it pretty quickly and get mindfully present. I highly recommend it for an amazing life and business with amazing results. Lately, though, I've been losing sight of my priorities. And the universe has a funny way of showing us when things are out of whack!
A lot of external demands are getting my attention lately. One of those is my 2 1/2 year old waking almost every night again for about a month, hence, I'm working on less sleep and much less deep sleep - which is what we require for our cognitive function to be at its best. That one can't really be controlled - except that I need to get to bed earlier (which is a blog in itself!).
However, I also have had other demands that I've been giving my attention to - others wanting to meet, the feeling that I must be networking all the time, responding to emails as soon as possible, the ever lengthening list of newsletters I must read, taking care of my family, being there for my friends in need - you know that list. Well, yeah, my list is looking like this lately. And if I wasn't going to do something about it, the universe was.
Last night, I had an awful dream and woke with a feeling that I couldn't shake. I had a 9:00 full-day networking event scheduled, I had to pack for a trip I'm leaving for tomorrow, and I have at least four items on my list that I must get done before I leave. I managed to get my daughter to daycare (my hubby is traveling for work) and arrive just a few minutes into the 9:00 session. I sat through the first session trying desperately to pay attention but my mind wandered to my 'to-do' list. Knowing I have full control of my thoughts, I began to practice accepting that I have a lot to do and I'm here now so be here.
I managed to get through the morning, but I was almost forcing my pitch to potential clients. I certainly was not in the right head space. Then, I found out that I was on the list for pitching my business one on one to potential clients for the afternoon. Last week, my printer broke, and I did not get my brochures printed for this event - however, I was OK with that because I didn't think I was on that list! I took a moment to think about what would happen if I pitched my business without feeling prepared. And I decided to give up my coveted seat for the afternoon session to someone on the wait-list. I was feeling guilty while driving home, my mind was in the clouds, and I was stopped by a police officer for speeding! Yes! I got a ticket!
I really need to be in the office right now. I need to take care of business. I need to focus. I need to clear off my desk. Although all of the things demanding my attention are important, my priorities lie at taking care of other things, including taking care of my sleep!
Being mindful is not woo-woo and fluff. In fact, it's as practical as it gets. When you are mindful, you inquire about your feelings and thoughts. When mind wandering started for me this morning (and recent weeks), I questioned what was going on for me to be unable to focus. Lack of sleep was the first answer, of course. But I continued to dig and got to the real answers - for me it is literally to spend time in the office getting things done and stop feeling guilty about not networking enough.. When you have the real answers, you can find the solutions that really work, rather than the band-aid ones.
If your list is growing and you really feel you are in the wrong place, try closing your eyes, pay attention to the feeling and sound of your breath, and question - what do you really need to be doing in order to enable yourself to feel present in your life? What is the ONE thing you can do that will make a big difference to your focus and productivity? Then do that. Scratch off all the things that aren't real priorities and get your priorities straight. And while you're at it, spend a little time meditating - because that will help you feel better in all ways.
Tina Pomroy uses mindfulness as a tool for managers, leaders, and business owners to be highly productive, lead high performing teams, and experience peace and happiness at work and in life.
Monday, November 18, 2013
Hire Higher
So many people have asked me how to hire the right people that will stay. There are many solutions for attraction and retention challenges, and the right one for you depends on your culture and current practices. However, finding the right person will depend on being the right environment.
I recently heard about a young woman interviewed at a photography studio. She is a smart, enthusiastic young lady with a strong work ethic who gets enjoyment out of serving customers with excellence. When she was called to be interviewed that same day, she cancelled an appointment in order to prepare for the interview. She was excited to potentially have her first job as a photographer - she'd already taken courses, had fun with the camera, given all of her friends and family the gift of photography, and was ready for a paid photography experience.
The young woman was seated in the customer area when she arrived... and that's where she stayed for an hour. The interviewer joined her for a few minutes to give her forms to complete and left her again. When the interviewer returned, she asked about hours of availability, and then, "Do you want the job?" The young lady said yes. The interviewer then proceeded to tell her about all of the awful job applicants she had received and the problems they have with recruitment and retention. Customers were in ear shot and the other employees carried on with each other having fun.... but in an unprofessional manner. All of this was noted by the young woman being interviewed.
The young woman accepted the job... with a caveat she didn't share with the interviewer. She was accepting the position to gain experience, and then she would leave. She had no intention of working in such an unprofessional environment for a long period of time. She valued excellence in customer service and wanted to work in an environment that also valued that kind of excellence.
This is not the first time I've heard a story like this.
If you want to hire 'higher'.... give your current management and employees the skills required to perform higher. Create a professional workplace that people with the right skills will want to work in... and stay working in. If you want to hire a person with excellence in specific skills or attitudes, make sure your workplace IS that first.
Excellence in management and leadership is the first requirement to hire higher. Finding and keeping the right person for the job is about first having an environment that person wants to work in.
Start cultivating excellence among your current team, and the right people will begin to show up... and will be more likely to stay.
I recently heard about a young woman interviewed at a photography studio. She is a smart, enthusiastic young lady with a strong work ethic who gets enjoyment out of serving customers with excellence. When she was called to be interviewed that same day, she cancelled an appointment in order to prepare for the interview. She was excited to potentially have her first job as a photographer - she'd already taken courses, had fun with the camera, given all of her friends and family the gift of photography, and was ready for a paid photography experience.
The young woman was seated in the customer area when she arrived... and that's where she stayed for an hour. The interviewer joined her for a few minutes to give her forms to complete and left her again. When the interviewer returned, she asked about hours of availability, and then, "Do you want the job?" The young lady said yes. The interviewer then proceeded to tell her about all of the awful job applicants she had received and the problems they have with recruitment and retention. Customers were in ear shot and the other employees carried on with each other having fun.... but in an unprofessional manner. All of this was noted by the young woman being interviewed.
The young woman accepted the job... with a caveat she didn't share with the interviewer. She was accepting the position to gain experience, and then she would leave. She had no intention of working in such an unprofessional environment for a long period of time. She valued excellence in customer service and wanted to work in an environment that also valued that kind of excellence.
This is not the first time I've heard a story like this.
If you want to hire 'higher'.... give your current management and employees the skills required to perform higher. Create a professional workplace that people with the right skills will want to work in... and stay working in. If you want to hire a person with excellence in specific skills or attitudes, make sure your workplace IS that first.
Excellence in management and leadership is the first requirement to hire higher. Finding and keeping the right person for the job is about first having an environment that person wants to work in.
Start cultivating excellence among your current team, and the right people will begin to show up... and will be more likely to stay.
Monday, September 16, 2013
Flat Tire
Several years ago, I was driving on the highway with my young daughter and I got a flat tire. I'd driven my car for numerous work trips across our geographically large province, some trips totaling over 2000 km in distance. My poor tire had enough. It had worn thin. It wasn't strong enough to withstand whatever it was I drove over that day, and it flattened.
My daughter was probably around 10 years old at the time. Of course, Mama had to be the rescuer! However, Mama didn't have the strength to remove the nuts off the tires to get the tire off! So I did the next best thing. When a motorcyclist stopped, I accepted his help. Less than a half hour later, we waved off our lovely savior and laughed most of the way home.
It was so easy to laugh off that experience. It was a sunny day. We were giggling at me trying to get the nuts off the tire. The whole event was just a blip in life and we shared the hilarious story many times afterwards.
Why then, is it so hard to fix the figurative flat tire in life?
When you are an entrepreneur, or a manager, or a parent.... you are on 'Go' from the moment you wake to the moment your head hits the pillow at night. You may even have trouble sleeping even though you're totally wiped. At some point, your energy depletes like the air in a tire and you go flat. You get unfocused. You might scream at someone. You forget to tell your husband that you need him to take the baby to daycare in the morning, resulting in a messy morning (yes, this happened to me recently). You are busy but unproductive.
You have a flat tire.
And you need to fill it with air or other things will start to break.
You know this feeling of a flat tire. It comes as confusion. Overwhelm. Chaos. Indecisiveness. Negativity. Low energy. A feeling of spinning your wheels - which is kind of funny since you have a flat tire!
And you know what to do to fix it. Take a break. Breathe. Meditate. Exercise. Do some yoga. Walk in nature. Talk it out with a coach. Organize your thoughts. Revisit your vision. All mindfulness techniques.
But you don't. You keep on going with your flat tire until you have heart palpitations. (I know this because I've had them.)
The answer to fixing your flat tire is awareness. Openness. And practice. Know the signs. Open yourself to just being and freeing your mind. Practice a mindfulness technique daily. And experience the harmony it brings to your business and your life.
Oh, and accept help from others. And laugh. Without those things, I'd still be on the highway with a flat tire.
Namaste
My daughter was probably around 10 years old at the time. Of course, Mama had to be the rescuer! However, Mama didn't have the strength to remove the nuts off the tires to get the tire off! So I did the next best thing. When a motorcyclist stopped, I accepted his help. Less than a half hour later, we waved off our lovely savior and laughed most of the way home.
It was so easy to laugh off that experience. It was a sunny day. We were giggling at me trying to get the nuts off the tire. The whole event was just a blip in life and we shared the hilarious story many times afterwards.
Why then, is it so hard to fix the figurative flat tire in life?
When you are an entrepreneur, or a manager, or a parent.... you are on 'Go' from the moment you wake to the moment your head hits the pillow at night. You may even have trouble sleeping even though you're totally wiped. At some point, your energy depletes like the air in a tire and you go flat. You get unfocused. You might scream at someone. You forget to tell your husband that you need him to take the baby to daycare in the morning, resulting in a messy morning (yes, this happened to me recently). You are busy but unproductive.
You have a flat tire.
And you need to fill it with air or other things will start to break.
You know this feeling of a flat tire. It comes as confusion. Overwhelm. Chaos. Indecisiveness. Negativity. Low energy. A feeling of spinning your wheels - which is kind of funny since you have a flat tire!
And you know what to do to fix it. Take a break. Breathe. Meditate. Exercise. Do some yoga. Walk in nature. Talk it out with a coach. Organize your thoughts. Revisit your vision. All mindfulness techniques.
But you don't. You keep on going with your flat tire until you have heart palpitations. (I know this because I've had them.)
The answer to fixing your flat tire is awareness. Openness. And practice. Know the signs. Open yourself to just being and freeing your mind. Practice a mindfulness technique daily. And experience the harmony it brings to your business and your life.
Oh, and accept help from others. And laugh. Without those things, I'd still be on the highway with a flat tire.
Namaste
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
Stage Presence: How Dance is Like Leadership
My daughter and I are dancers. As my daughter prepares for re-entering dance as a big part of her life, I am reflecting on dance and what it has meant for us.
When I danced much more seriously than I do now, I remembered every step. I was usually placed in front of the class or stage. I was selected for ballet exams. I was selected for a performing group. Every style I tried, I learned with ease. I was technically a good dancer.
My daughter was also selected for ballet exams, remembered her steps, and was selected to be a dance teacher assistant. She tried many styles of dance and was good at all of them. But here's the difference. She had stage presence. This made her a much better dancer.
When my daughter stepped onto the stage, she was a performer. She had an amazing smile and tilt of her head. She had expression. Her passion and desire for the dance made the audience feel like time stood still. She knew how to engage the audience with her presence. It didn't matter if she made a technical error or that one of the other girls was technically better. She shone and continues to shine on stage.
As a teenager, she has no idea what this has to do with leadership. As a leader and a person who teaches leadership, I see some connections, and here are four:
Love. She loves dance. She loves what she's doing. She'd perform every day if she could. She'd dance all day long. She isn't working on making a smile on her face... she really is smiling! The engagement of the audience isn't something she purposefully made happen... she really is engaging.
Practice. As with any kind of performance, you have to practice your dance routine. A lot. It takes hours of commitment, many mistakes, and sometimes painful feet. And, yeah, sometimes tears. To become that person on stage that has the technical excellence as well as the presence, you go further, you dance more, and you make the practice a priority in your life.
Questioning. When she missed a class, she had to ask someone to help her know the steps. When she was not bending far enough into a pliƩ, she had to ask her teacher how she could master the depth required to perform better in exams. If she was practicing on stage and she wasn't in line with everyone else, she had to ask where she was supposed to stand. Dance is not a solo act.
Authenticity. This is what made my daughter a better dancer. We both loved, practiced, and questioned. That made both of us good dancers. But she stands out because of her authenticity. She has her own style. She realizes her dream and lets go of inhibitions. For a year or two, she lost this... having normal teenage fears. But when she is her most authentic self, time stands still as she glides across the stage.... bringing tears to this mamas eyes! ;)
So where's the connection with leadership?
Love. The best leaders love their work and the contribution they are making to the people they lead. They have a great passion for contributing to society and the world. To lead well, that passion is natural. A great leader needs to find that love and follow it.
Practice. Excellence in leadership is practiced for many years. It takes making a lot of mistakes and learning from them. It takes a continual effort at improving and practicing leadership skills. You don't start out at 3 years old as a prima ballerina. It starts with music and movement. You have to get the basic steps mastered before you can move on to performing on stage without error (don't you love the 3- and 4-year old performers, though?!). Some say leaders are born, others say they are made. I say, you can have a natural ability to lead, but you have to practice and make mistakes and be open to learning how to do it better in order to be excellent. I also say that in your practice, you need to let others be right and try things on that you may not believe is right. This allows a leader to see others' perspectives and be able to lead different people better. You go further. You are not satisfied with a good job. You want to make a difference and make the biggest difference you can.
Questioning. One of the biggest fears of many leaders is that someone will find out they don't know the answer. If you've ever felt this, you are NOT alone! A great leader questions. They know they do not have all the answers, and they let others know. They are good leaders. Not encyclopedias (or, for the younger generation, Google:). When they are stuck, they seek answers from others. When they don't have the expertise, they find someone who does. They collaborate. And they ask questions to everyone, no matter what their position or title. The team they lead will be asked to contribute their individual knowledge, skills, and unique attributes. This not only makes the leader a better leader, but it engages the team.
Authenticity. People can feel if something is forced or 'faked'. If a leader is not being truthful with him or herself, they will not be authentic with others. This takes work for many. Knowing yourself is the key for excellence in leadership and for engaging your team. A leader typically does not make it to that role without the technical knowledge and skills required. But without exploring who you are, how you can make an impact, and what your unique style is, you may technically be a good leader, but you probably aren't bringing tears to the audience's eyes.
If you are looking for stage presence in your leadership, contact Tina at tina@pomroy.ca about the Business Buddha Leadership Coaching program or the Mindful Management Program for managers and leaders of any group or business.
Friday, August 16, 2013
Judgement Day
Have you ever caught yourself judging a person? We all do it... some more than others. I'm working on reducing my judgement, and as a result I'm much more aware of it when I do it.
Last weekend, I was playing on the beach with my 2-year old. It was sunny, the beach was spattered with people relaxing and playing, and my husband had gone snorkeling in the ocean. I noticed a lady who was very skinny... anorexic skinny. My first reaction was: "Oh my gosh, how could she do that to herself?" (Total judgement!) Then I saw a man come over and hug her and rub her back with affection. And I thought: "She is surrounded by love... her sister (twin) is there with her.... a young child is there with her... a loving man is there with her." And THEN I felt different. I felt compassion. I felt a little sadness. I felt like going over there and giving her a hug. I realized that I was in judgement... for about 30 seconds.
I have no idea what this woman's challenges were. I do not even know if she had anorexia, which is a serious disease, and how dare I judge?! And it doesn't matter if the woman is surrounded by love or totally alone. It doesn't matter if she's perfectly healthy or near death. How dare I judge.
Here's the message. We never know. Even if we did know, we don't know. Because it's THEIR life and THEIR experiences. We can't know. We can only send love. And compassion. And when it's someone in our lives or someone we CAN touch, we help if we can and if they accept.
In business, it's exactly the same. How many times have you said, "I can't believe he did that." "If she did the course, she must know what to do." "Who comes to work late?" "How disrespectful of him to not call to let us know he'll be late." "She must be lazy - she's so unproductive." "The younger generation just doesn't have any loyalty." "I would never do what he did." The list goes on and on and on.... doesn't it?
I had a chat with a business owner recently who hired a cook. He said, "Doesn't everyone know how to peel potatoes? I don't understand how he cannot know how to peel a potato!" Well.... no, not everyone knows how to peel potatoes. The fact is, unless they've been taught and/or had the experience, they don't know. And maybe, they do know, but their way is different. Maybe they were taught differently. As a manager, it's your responsibility to hire as well as possible and then guide your employee towards excellence. Not judge. Help them move through their challenges so they CAN be excellent at what you've hired them to do.
Next week, try to be aware of when you make a judgement about an employee or team member. Think of all the possible reasons they might have said what they said or done what they did. And realize that it's not your place to judge, rather guide.
How are you going to guide this week?
Namaste
Last weekend, I was playing on the beach with my 2-year old. It was sunny, the beach was spattered with people relaxing and playing, and my husband had gone snorkeling in the ocean. I noticed a lady who was very skinny... anorexic skinny. My first reaction was: "Oh my gosh, how could she do that to herself?" (Total judgement!) Then I saw a man come over and hug her and rub her back with affection. And I thought: "She is surrounded by love... her sister (twin) is there with her.... a young child is there with her... a loving man is there with her." And THEN I felt different. I felt compassion. I felt a little sadness. I felt like going over there and giving her a hug. I realized that I was in judgement... for about 30 seconds.
I have no idea what this woman's challenges were. I do not even know if she had anorexia, which is a serious disease, and how dare I judge?! And it doesn't matter if the woman is surrounded by love or totally alone. It doesn't matter if she's perfectly healthy or near death. How dare I judge.
Here's the message. We never know. Even if we did know, we don't know. Because it's THEIR life and THEIR experiences. We can't know. We can only send love. And compassion. And when it's someone in our lives or someone we CAN touch, we help if we can and if they accept.
In business, it's exactly the same. How many times have you said, "I can't believe he did that." "If she did the course, she must know what to do." "Who comes to work late?" "How disrespectful of him to not call to let us know he'll be late." "She must be lazy - she's so unproductive." "The younger generation just doesn't have any loyalty." "I would never do what he did." The list goes on and on and on.... doesn't it?
I had a chat with a business owner recently who hired a cook. He said, "Doesn't everyone know how to peel potatoes? I don't understand how he cannot know how to peel a potato!" Well.... no, not everyone knows how to peel potatoes. The fact is, unless they've been taught and/or had the experience, they don't know. And maybe, they do know, but their way is different. Maybe they were taught differently. As a manager, it's your responsibility to hire as well as possible and then guide your employee towards excellence. Not judge. Help them move through their challenges so they CAN be excellent at what you've hired them to do.
Next week, try to be aware of when you make a judgement about an employee or team member. Think of all the possible reasons they might have said what they said or done what they did. And realize that it's not your place to judge, rather guide.
How are you going to guide this week?
Namaste
Monday, August 5, 2013
The Buddha in Business
A few people have questioned my use of 'Business Buddha' in my programs. So, I had to question it myself. Do I really want to use that term - Buddha? Does it turn away my clients? Does it portray something I'm not?
For now, I'm keeping it. And here's why....
Indeed, Buddhism is a religion and my programs have nothing to do with religion. However, the word Buddhism comes from 'budhi', which means 'to awaken'. In today's world, Buddhism can also mean a way of being, rather than simply a religion. That way of being is to be aware and mindful of your thoughts and actions and develop understanding and wisdom.
Taking these concepts to business can shift challenges into success and create happier, more productive work environments.
We often get lost in the day to day and lose sight of what is truly important and how we can ease conflicts and frustrations. Business managers and leaders are faced with decisions and work overload and responsibility on top of their day to day activities. When they are acting and making decisions that are not mindful, it creates a ripple effect in their teams, organizations, customers, and all stakeholders. It creates arguments, mistakes, resentment, gossip, poor performance, loss of customers, negative publicity, and the list goes on. Thinking and behaving mindfully can reverse all of this.
I focus on leaders and managers because they are the catalysts in their organizations and groups. They lead the way. Effective leaders create leaders, and they will create leaders similar to them. Imagine a workplace where leaders cultivate other mindful employees. Responding to customer inquiries becomes easier. Collaboration soars. Change will flow more easily. New programs will be implemented without so much drama attached to them. AND, people go home to their families happy.
And that's what my Business Buddha Program can do for you. We take your business and people challenges and shift your thinking about them. We create solutions to catapult your organization and team in the right direction. We do it by using mindfulness and understanding.
This is not the soft, fluffy side of business. This is business done right. I'm pretty sure most would consider Google to be a successful organization. Google is just one business that uses mindfulness as a business strategy. And it's working.
Namaste
For now, I'm keeping it. And here's why....
Indeed, Buddhism is a religion and my programs have nothing to do with religion. However, the word Buddhism comes from 'budhi', which means 'to awaken'. In today's world, Buddhism can also mean a way of being, rather than simply a religion. That way of being is to be aware and mindful of your thoughts and actions and develop understanding and wisdom.
Taking these concepts to business can shift challenges into success and create happier, more productive work environments.
We often get lost in the day to day and lose sight of what is truly important and how we can ease conflicts and frustrations. Business managers and leaders are faced with decisions and work overload and responsibility on top of their day to day activities. When they are acting and making decisions that are not mindful, it creates a ripple effect in their teams, organizations, customers, and all stakeholders. It creates arguments, mistakes, resentment, gossip, poor performance, loss of customers, negative publicity, and the list goes on. Thinking and behaving mindfully can reverse all of this.
I focus on leaders and managers because they are the catalysts in their organizations and groups. They lead the way. Effective leaders create leaders, and they will create leaders similar to them. Imagine a workplace where leaders cultivate other mindful employees. Responding to customer inquiries becomes easier. Collaboration soars. Change will flow more easily. New programs will be implemented without so much drama attached to them. AND, people go home to their families happy.
And that's what my Business Buddha Program can do for you. We take your business and people challenges and shift your thinking about them. We create solutions to catapult your organization and team in the right direction. We do it by using mindfulness and understanding.
This is not the soft, fluffy side of business. This is business done right. I'm pretty sure most would consider Google to be a successful organization. Google is just one business that uses mindfulness as a business strategy. And it's working.
Namaste
Contact Tina Pomroy at tinapomroy@hotmail.com to learn more about the
Business Buddha Program.
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